Top Ten Non-Fiction Books for Gay / Queer Teenagers

This site blog gets a lot of readers who arrive here via searches for terms like “books for gay teens” and other similar searches. While I do review books for kids and, especially teenagers from time to time, I admit I haven’t really focused on them since I’m “several” years removed from being a teenager myself.

I’ve decided to focus today on a list of works of non-fiction that are geared toward the gay – or as today’s teenager prefers to call it, queer – teen in need of information, guidance or who is just looking for a book about others like themselves. These books will include information for teens who are questioning. On “Movie Review Friday” I’ll review some more teen oriented movies and on “Fiction Monday” I’ll cover queer teen fiction. I’ll also try to create a page on the site for teen related books and movies that’s all in one as opposed to being mixed in with all the other stuff.

Please Note: If you are a teenager in crisis; if you’re considering suicide right now don’t read any further! Please call the Trevor Project NOW at 866-4-U-TREVOR (866-488-7386). You are not alone. People are standing by to help you 24 hours a day.

As for the books I’ve chosen; these are all ranked 4 stars or more on Amazon.com and have received high reader reviews from readers just like you and me. They’re numbered 1-10 but really in no particular order. There are 3 or 4 that I have reviewed previously on this site.

1. It Gets Better: Coming Out, Overcoming Bullying, and Creating a Life Worth Living by Dan Savage and Terry Miller. This was previously reviewed on this site.

2.  The Transgender Child: A Handbook for Families and Professionals by Stephanie A. Brill and Rachel Pepper. ”Libraries may own books dealing with transgender adults, but this is the only guide about raising transgender children. While the general message to parents is that “you have nothing to apologize for and nothing to be embarrassed about,” the authors make it clear that parents and families will not have it easy. Realistic and empowering. Background: What do you do when it’s Grandma’s birthday dinner and your eight-year-old son insists on wearing his dress and Mary Janes? And how do you handle dating when your transgirl daughter still has male sex organs? Brill (founder, Gender Spectrum Education and Training) and Pepper (coordinator, LGBT studies, Yale Univ.) bring solid credentials and years of research to help parents and others deal with issues specific to transgender children. Answers may not be easy, but blaming the child, denying access to transgender friends, and verbal threats are not helpful. When parents recognize their child’s gender identity, there can be feelings of confusion, anger, shock, fear, shame, and grief. Most children have gender identities by age two or three; like homosexuality, being transgender is not a choice. Nor is it, as it has often been labeled, “acting out” in anger against parents. There is much detail about medical practices and legal matters, most of which become issues as transgender children become adults.”—Linda Beck, Indian Valley P.L., Telford, PA – Library Journal–June 24, 2008″

3.  Queer: The Ultimate LGBT Guide for Teens by Kathy Belge and Marke Bieschke. Illustrated by Christian Robinson. This was previously reviewed on this site.

4. GLBTQ: The Survival Guide for Gay, Lesbian, Bisexual, Transgender, and Questioning Teens by Kelly Huegel. “When it was first published in 2003, GLBTQ quickly became the indispensable resource for gay, lesbian, bisexual, transgender, and questioning teens. This fully revised and updated edition retains all of the straightforward information and practical advice of the original edition while providing a contemporary look at society and its growing acceptance of people who are GLBTQ. Included are updates on efforts to promote equality, including the current status of legislative initiatives concerning safe schools, gay marriage, workplace equality, transgender expression, and Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell. Issues-based information and advice address coming out, prejudice, getting support, staying safe, making healthy choices, and thriving in school. This frank, sensitive book is written for young people who are beginning to question their sexual or gender identity, those who are ready to work for GLBTQ rights, and those who may need advice, guidance, or reassurance that they are not alone.”

5. Is It a Choice? Answers to the Most Frequently Asked Questions About Gay & Lesbian People, Third Edition by Eric Marcus. This book was previously reviewed on this site.

6. From Boys to Men: Gay Men Write About Growing Up edited by Ted Gidoense and Robert Williams. “More than an anthology of coming out stories, From Boys to Men is a stunning collection of essays about what it is like to be gay and young, to be different and be aware of that difference from the earliest of ages. In these memoirs, coming out is less important than coming of age and coming to the realization that young gay people experience the world in ways quite unlike straight boys. Whether it is a fascination with soap opera, an intense sensitivity to their own difference, or an obsession with a certain part of the male anatomy, gay kids — or kids who would eventually identify as gay — have an indefinable but unmistakable gay sensibility. Sometimes the result is funny, sometimes it is harrowing, and often it is deeply moving. Essays by lauded young writers like Alex Chee (Edinburgh), Aaron Hamburger (Faith for Beginners), Karl Soehnlein (The World of Normal Boys), Trebor Healy (Through It Came Bright Colors), Tom Dolby (The Trouble Boy), David Bahr, and Austin Bunn, are collected along with those by brilliant, newcomers such as Michael McAllister, Jason Tougaw, Viet Dinh, and the wildly popular blogger, Joe.My.God.”

7. Two Teenagers in 20: Writings by Gay and Lesbian Youth by Ann Heron. “An updated version of Heron’s 1983 One Teenager in Ten , this consistently absorbing and frequently moving collection of autobiographical narratives by young gays and lesbians across the country soberingly documents the damaging consequences of the homophobia that pervades even purportedly enlightened families and schools. Many of the authors were kicked out of their homes, were sent to ministers or psychiatrists to be “cured” or attempted suicide. But some found their families and friends supportive and caring. On balance, these stories are overwhelmingly affirmative, buoyed by the authors’ new self-awareness and the determination to find a place for themselves in an often hostile country. Heron includes advice on contacting social service organizations and an annotated list of fiction and nonfiction titles that deal sensitively with gay and lesbian issues.
Copyright 1994 Reed Business Information, Inc.”

8. Coming Out, Coming In: Nurturing the Well-Being and Inclusion of Gay Youth in Mainstream Society by Linda Goldman. This book was previously reviewed on this site.

9. Get By: A Survival Guide for Black Gay Youth by Jonathan W. Jones. “To be a male who is both Black and Gay is often referred to as ‘the greatest taboo’. Growing up with such a stigma presents the young African-American homosexual with a lifetime of dilemmas. This book gives Black Gay youth a comprehensive guide to embracing their identity and developing into a proud, strong, and powerful member of their communities. With chapters on coming out, staying healthy, Black Gay history, religion, safe sex, drugs, self-defense, and more, ‘Get By: A Survival Guide for Black Gay Youth’ serves to empower the young Black Gay male against rising adversity, and triumph in the face of multiple oppressions.”

10.  Always My Child: A Parent’s Guide to Understanding Your Gay, Lesbian, Bisexual, Transgendered or Questioning Son or Daughter by Kevin Jennings and Pat Shapiro. “Filled with real-life stories, scientific research and practical advice, Jennings’ latest (after Becoming Invisible) stresses the importance of family acceptance for a child’s self-esteem and the need to create a safe haven at home for GLBTQ teens, who often feel depressed, isolated, and harassed by peers and society at large. Drawing from countless anecdotal stories, as well as his own experiences growing up gay in a disapproving Southern Baptist atmosphere, Jennings encourages parents to understand their children’s culture (by watching movies and television, visiting Web sites, and listening to music), recognize the myths of sexual orientation, identify warning signs for drug abuse, depression, eating disorders, and suicide, and learn how they may unwittingly be perpetuating gender stereotypes by facing their own prejudices. Models for coming out, and down-to-earth tips on dealing with the various stages of acceptance are thoroughly explained, and Jennings, writing with Shapiro (A Parent’s Guide to Childhood and Adolescent Depression), includes an extensive resource section at the end of the book. He also provides sample conversations to help facilitate open lines of communication with children on every issue. Jennings’ attention to the unique religious and cultural difficulties of “double minorities” and his accessible, topic-specific chapters make this a useful guide for both parents and teachers.
Copyright 2002 Reed Business Information, Inc.”